I was Kidding

Okay you guys. I thought you all knew me well enough to know that...

Yesterday's post was a JOKE.

The outside of our townhouse does not look like that. I could insert a really nice picture here, but, that camera has left the Gulf of Mexico headed out for an Deep Sea fishing experience, so that picture will have to wait. What's that you say? You know I have a gazillion other camera's with me, why not go take a picture right now? CAUSE it's the awful hour of 5:30 AM, it's still dark outside!

This means that you will have to use your imagination for this next bit...
all you folks getting ready for work and sipping your hot coffee...be careful...

Yesterday the girls went parasailing. You would think that this story would be all about the girls experience. NOT. I paid for two observers to go on the boat. I thought Angela was going with me. Angela thought she would go with me, until...

Insert surprising scary music...

She saw the Wave Runner pulling the double banana float that we were to ride out to the boat in the ocean. She looked at me and said, not no, but HECK no, I'm not riding that thing out to that boat way the heck out there. Garrie will go.

Garrie who can not swim.

He was game. We strapped on our life jackets and headed for the banana.

Now is the time to put down the coffee, diet drinks, or anything that might cause you to choke...

I got on that banana just fine. I was good. They were excited. Picture this, we are still sitting on the SHORE. Haven't moved. A huge wave crashes into the banana and knocks me off the banana into the middle of the banana where the water sucks me in and wedges me in between the two bananas. Now, we all know I'm a big ol' girl. Here we are still on the BEACH and I can't even sit on the thing, much less ride the dang thing out to the middle of the ocean. What's even funnier? The cute little "nice shirt" guide looks at me and its alright girl, you go ahead and ride right there. Could he not see that I was planning on staying there because there was no way on God's Green Earth that I could pull myself up out of that hole? I mean come on people. We bounce on out to ocean, while everyone riding the banana was enjoying the view of their loved ones waving at them from the shore, I was enjoying having my face smashed between the two bananas.

We are now at the boat. The cute little guide says "Watch me, this is how we are gonna get on the boat." He pulls the banana up to the side of the boat. Captain holds on to the banana, the guide stands up on the banana, turns around, plops his butt on the side of the boat and swings his legs over and he's in the boat. Easy, piece of cake. (Wait a minute bud. There's a huge deck on this boat sitting even with the water and we are not just gonna step right on that deck?) Mary Margaret and Taylor had no problems.

Its my turn. Seeing how I rode side saddle, with one leg over the seat I was supposed to be in, my face smashed in the middle of the banana and my boobs doing the splits IN THE LIFE VEST, I was thinking, THIS IS GOING TO GO WELL. I can feel it.
Garrie, the gentleman that he is, a non-swimming gentleman, stays on the banana to let me go first. I wiggle myself out of the death banana and manage to stand up, fall forward, grab the side of the boat, and push the banana out several feet away from the boat. They reel us back in. I try to stand up, turn around and plop my butt on the boat. Yeah, not happening. I did the splits. Garrie yells, "She's going in the ocean man! She's gonna go between the banana and the boat!" I'm thinking...If I go in the ocean LEAVE ME and send out the Coast Guard with that nifty little life saving thingy. I managed to not go in the ocean. After 9 more unsuccessful GRACEFUL attempts to get in the boat, the cute little guide says, "Okay mam lets try this, I'll hold on to your life vest and pull you in."

Dude couldn't have weighed more than 115 pounds WET.

Surprisingly THIS WORKS. Um, excuse me, could we have tried this 20 minutes ago? Our cute little guide fell while hauling me in the boat and cut both of his knees.

Garrie, who was just about to die laughing, stands up, turns around, and plops his butt right on the boat and swings his legs over. (I'm secretly not talking to him at this point. I mean he could have at least made it LOOK hard.)

Girls get harnessed up, the sail into the sky, cute little guide jumps around taking pictures, cause I was smart and left the camera on shore with Angela (chicken) and Tim.

During the banana ride to the boat, Angela and Tim were on the shore commenting that one minute they saw me and the next I was gone, but they could still see one of my legs sticking straight up from the middle of the banana so Tim thinks I'm still on the banana having a blast.

BTW, another group came out and hopped on the boat. I'm secretly not liking any of them either. Well, take that back, I think dude that straddled the boat and fell over into boat hitting his head could be my next best friend.

Getting out of the boat was just as graceful as getting in. Guide practically PUSHED me out of the boat onto the BANANA. Yep, you ride it in, you ride it out. I love that banana. I did manage to stay up right this time. Garrie on the other hand did not fare as well as I did getting out. They push him out, he lands on the banana, half on, half off. His HAT slips off and NON-SWIMMING Garrie goes after the hat, clonks his head against the boat HARD, slipping into the ocean half way and SAVES THE HAT!!! He looks at me and says, "I ain't loosing a $5 hat!"

We make it to shore and I roll off into what I thought was at least knee deep water. NOT. More like an inch deep. I laid there for a few minutes.

Enjoying the LAND.

Garrie was mumbling that his head hurt.

You'll have to ask the girls how they like parasailing, I don't even remember it.

BYOL

You know a Butler Diaries vacation is not complete unless there has been a report about our hotel in this case Townhouse.

Remember last year Tim made us change hotels every night and do you remember the locking system? The wire you slipped around the knob. Oh, wait, what about the no tell motel that had the ______hair in the bathtub.

Well we have done it again. We have rented the best place in Perdido Key. We call it BYOL. Bring Your Own Ladder.


After purchasing our ladder and the 2 hour climb up with Angela giving me the EYE for renting such a wonderful place, we made it inside and it was way better on the inside than outside.

Taylor on the lounge. They are taking turns sleeping on the couch and the lounge. So far the lounge looses the comfortable test.


A few pictures of the inside. There were some people still in bed this morning when I was taking the pictures, so no pictures of the bedrooms.

Rain Rain Go Away

Today it rained, rained, rained. The forecast is calling for rain for the rest of the week. We are hoping it will clear up so the girls can swim at least one more time.

Angela and Garrie are relieved that I live with teenagers and they have the empty nest. I think that this week has cured that empty nest feeling.

I'm working on a slide show.

We are having a great time.

Mary Margaret told us today that quadruplets are the same thing as 4 twins.
Seriously.



Tim found this ad in one of the local free newspapers. He wanted me to have a copy of this to remember, that when we met, I drove a Cutlas Supreme, fell in love with a total stud muffin and then married the stud named Butler.

Okay. He really liked it because it has his name on it. I threw in all the sappy stuff. He wanted it on the blog so his brother could see it, but I know he was THINKING all that sappy stuff, I could see it on his sunburnt face.

Okay, so now he points out that its a Monte Carlo Super Sport, BUT, I say that it looks awfully close to the Blue Cutlas Supreme that I used to drive in 1991.

While Driving to Pensacola

While driving to Pensacola, Angela (my sisterinlaw) and I decided to go ahead and book the boys fishing charter. We wanted to make sure they got first choice.



I'm excited!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

While we were waiting on our townhouse, we visited a few parks. This picture is of the aligator lagoon in the Perdido West Key National Park, its absolutly beautiful.

Exercise Without the Wii

I love the Wii. Unfortunately I have still can not get it hooked up correctly with that stupid converter box we have to have to get the digital signal, which means the Wii hasn't been used all summer.

What have I been doing to exercise? Swimming. I haven't been doing it every day, enough to not gain my lost weight back.

The girls were at the Butler's last night I had to swim by myself, darn it. JOANNA, I tried my best to get a picture of all the bats diving for mosquitoes last night, but they were too darn fast. There were tons of them out last night about dusk.

Exercise #1: Usually I have the girls make a whirlpool and I walk against it. I had to make my own whirlpool and then walk against the current last night, so I got double the work out. I usually do this walking front and then backwards.

Exercise #2: Swimming in place. It's not nearly as hard as you think. I get in the middle of the pool, float on my back and make "snow angels". This keeps you basically in one place and kinds of works like jumping jacks without all the impact.

Exercise #3: Ball Swimming. (Taylor named this one) Curl into a ball floating on your side. Use one arm to turn you in circles. Swap sides and do it again.

Exercise #4: Running. Run in the water picking your knees up high. It is very important to not lean forward, you will slip and go down, not gracefully. Run about 4 laps around the pool, you will feel the pain and be out of breath! For a little arm workout during this one, put your hands down to your side and pull them up out of the water while running, feel the burn. The girls secretly took a picture of me doing this. The picture self destructed.

Exercise #5: Running in place.

Exercise #6: Good old fashioned swimming.

I could go on and on. I have noticed that I am not as sore in the morning after those workouts like I was with the walking and Wii.

Motivation to keep moving in the pool in the Arkansas twilight? Mosquitoes. Stop and they will pick you up and carry you off.

I am going to propose a challenge Dianne and her crew over at Country and Loving It . They have just taken a family membership to the local gym. I want to compare our workout and weight loss to theirs, somehow. This is a surprise to Dianne, cause she's just finding this out as she reads it. It will start when we get back from vacation.

The girls have been walking down and up our drive way everyday they've been home during the week, on their own. I did not force them to!

I was shopping for evening wear for our trip for myself. I had to stop when I found this picture...
UglyPromDress someone seriously let their daughter leave the house dressed like that. OMGosh.

Beach Wear Teaser

I might wear these to the beach. I usually try to wear these only at home, but why hide such beauty?


Whats scary? Mary Margaret and Taylor thinks I would look beeee-uuu-tiful in these.
The girls are getting restless.

I LOVE COMMENTS and VACATION

I love the comments I'm getting! I should dress people more often! Coming soon: My Beach outfit!

We are getting prepared to leave for Pensacola, Florida for vacation. Tim's sister and husband are going with us, which promises to be a hoot! Mary Margaret is sure she will get Garrie to parasail, zip line or maybe even bungee jump.

All summer the girls have been doing odd jobs to earn their "playing money" for vacation, these girls have been working hard.

Mary Margaret has, baby sat for Sandy, mowed my bosses yard all summer, chores at our child labor camp, mowed a cemetery, and tons of odd jobs at the funeral home.
Taylor has helped my bosses wife with her grocery shopping all summer, toted stuff to the attic for my bosses wife, cleaned up a cemetery, helped my boss with the flags for the veterans in our cemetery all summer, and done tons of odd jobs at the funeral home, plus her chores at our child labor camp that we live at.

Mary Margaret set herself back a little when she had to pay on the phone bill. She's almost back up where she was until that fiasco. Taylor has counted, counted, and recounted her money 1,999,999,999 times this week. She has now decided that she is willing to spend only $20 of her money towards her number one vacation activity so that she can spend the rest on cute clothes for back to school IF I agree to pay for the rest of her GO CART RIDING. HA!!!!!! We did not cut a deal.

My plans are to sit, relax, read a book, get some sun, build a sand castle and have a good time with my family. This will be a first for the girls and Tim. I can boast a little, I have been to the beach way back in the day when I was 6 or so way back in 1979. Taylor said that trip didn't count since it was soooooooo long ago.

I say to her WHATEVA.

For Linda @ 2nd Cup of Coffee

Linda @ 2nd Cup of Coffee left me this comment...
"You are too funny. Where do you find these things? Not that I would personally want to buy them ...."

I read it this way..."OMGosh, Kaye I want you to be my personal stylist. Oh, the parties we could own with your style and my grace, we could be a huge success."

So, Linda, I am honored to dress you!!!!



I had to make sure to get Linda the same shorts as Diannes, I wouldn't want the girls to fight over each other's shorts.

Aren't these shoes just to die for? $36 at buy costumes.com

I wanted to make sure that Linda's cute little puppy did not feel left out so I found a carrier to match Linda's outfit.

Stop by 2nd Cup of Coffee, tell Linda I sent you!

Mary Margaret had her root canal done today. Dr. Jackson is just the best. I won't tell all the details, she wants to blog about it herself when she finally gets ungrounded. I can tell this little tid bit...

Sitting in the living room watching Maiden Voyage (not a great movie) Mary Margaret says...
MM: How come I didn't get any oil polish today?
ME: Polish for what?
MM: My crowned tooth. I thought I was supposed to get a rag and tooth polish to keep it shined and clean.
ME: (lol as hard as I can) No, you don't get a polish rag, where did you get that?
MM: A lady at the Good Shepard Center where I work takes her dentures out and polishes her gold tooth everyday. I thought I would have to do that too.
ME: (LOL HARDER) OMGosh, no you didn't. OMGosh you crack me up!!!
MM: WHAT!!!!!!??????? I thought that maybe because of all the gas and shots I got that maybe I missed the demonstration on how to clean it.
ME: No sweetheart, you didn't miss a thing...

We are still laughing 2 hours later

Christmas Presents

I know, I know, its too early for talk about Christmas, but, if I don't do it now, I might forget it later, cause I have "sometimers". I'm sorry to say that it starts in your 30's, so all the teeny boppers that read this blog have something to look forward too. Yay!!!

After shopping with Dianne and Nicole, the other weekend, I have a better sense as to what their needs and wants are for Christmas.
This post is all about Dianne.


DIANNE, YOU MUST CLOSE YOUR EYES TO READ THE REST OF THE POST!!!

The first thing Dianne asked for was the most fabulous leggings ever. She even begged Nicole and I to buy them for her, on her hands and knees begged. Okay, well maybe not that kind of begging, but, she did say she would wear them if we bought them for her.

She'll need these shorts to wear over those breath taking leggings...


I'm still undecided about the shoes. Dianne wants yellow stripper shoes but I want to go with comfortable, so its a toss up between the tennis shoe or the boot, or maybe I'll throw caution to the wind and get her both.


A girl has to have a new top to complete her new outfit, right? So I'm going with this little number...


I'm excited about all my Christmas shopping this year.

Y'all Crack Me Up

Y'all crack me up! Really, you do. Some of the comments left on my blog crack me up and of course there are those that don't. Here's a few that made me chuckle or say WHAT?

Several weeks ago my post on "Cloudy Water and Other Updates"
Dianne:
Child Labor ROCKS! Just ask ANYONE WITH KIDS, who is not 18 and wants to make boobie implants.

Anonymous replied by posting this today:
You make me sick,
and Dianne, being 18 and wanting to make boobie implants is better than being probably say... nearly fifty? and having nothing but the messed up view that child labour 'rocks'
you're all so pathetic

This cracks me up because ANONYMOUS will be 50 someday too!


Several times this was left on my comments: n______n
So I sent a message to Anonymous on the 20th Century and Beyond Post:
Anonymous
What is n________n I guess I'm too old to get it.

Today Anonymous responds
Anonymous said...
hurr durr,
it's a face.

WHAT? Well alright. Truly not childish at all. I'm not sure what face it is.

Finally on the post "Drama is Back at Butler Manor"
EmmaP said...
Oh-My-Good-Holy-Hannah! Even *I* feel DUPED!!! How old is this JACOB ADAMS character? OMGOSH!!! I cannot WAIT!!! This is like a CLIFF-HANGER!!!


Emma cracked me up with the Oh-My-Good-Holy-Hannah!

Lazy Sunday Afternoon

Today after church I decided it was time to let our lab, Drake, out of his pin for some exercise. He does not get along with the cat, Pepper and the other dog, Freckles, so we bring them inside while he is out. Oh, and we stay inside to cause he's wild.

Mary Margaret and Freckles playing peek-a-boo.


Now, I'm not trying to start anything with Freckles, but quite frankly, he stinks, bad, so we lay out some towels for him to lay on. Pepper spent her time stretched out under my feet and slept all afternoon.

We watched the original Witch Mountain this afternoon and snacked on brownies made by Mary Margaret. Tonight, Taylor cooked pizza. I feel really lazy.

Not So Quiet Saturday

There were no funerals this weekend, which for me means a quiet Saturday at home, NOT.

All day Saturday Taylor tried to pack for our vacation. We leave NEXT Sunday night. She has also made a list of everything she is going to buy while on vacation, such as, walkie talkies, school supplies, blue high heeled shoes, pet fish, and she plans to bring back enough sand to make our own beach. She talked about everything you could imagine. Right at this very moment we are trying to watch a movie and she is wanting to get our portable DVD player out and ready to go.
This is a Taylor statement today coming into the city limits of Wynne, she is listening to her iPod as loud as possible..."Dang, Pop was 8,689 years old"
Me: Who are you talking about Taylor?
Taylor: Pop
Me: Who is that?
Taylor: It says so on that green sign back there by the cemetery, Pop, 8689.
Me: That stands for POPULATION

Good News: Pool is not as cloudy as it was
Bad News: It now looks like this...

This afternoon, I did a little grocery shopping, one of my stops was the Water Garden, an organic vegetable stand. I bought 4.5 pounds of green tomatoes and two red. During the whole grocery shopping trip, both girls talked non-stop. I am guilty of tunning some of it out at the times that I thought they were talking just to hear themselves talk.
Of course, down here in the south, we fry our tomatoes...

Cast iron skillet, flour and corn meal, and salt. Slice the tomatoes really thin and fry turning until brown. We also had fried 'taters and onions and Rib Eye's. Yum Yum

How was your Saturday?

When Teens Read Newspapers

Today, Taylor read the Jonesboro Sun. At lunch she decides to go over the articles she read without letting me in on what was going on. We are riding along Falls Blvd, she is jabbering away, I'm a million miles away thinking about what all needs to be done this afternoon, doing some banking in my head, wondering about laundry, etc.

Taylor: Our post office moving I wonder why.
ME: What did you say?
Taylor: I said our post office is moving to Jonesboro, now we'll have to drive all the way to Jonesboro to get mail. Bill will not be able to walk to the post office now for sure.
ME: our post office is not moving to Jonesboro, thats 45 miles away.
Taylor: the newspaper said it was moving to Jonesboro. If you get to go get the mail can I go so we can go to Chili's or maybe Colton's?
ME: Jonesboro built a new post office and the old post office is moving into the new building.
Taylor: oh, okay, can I get a new blog background? I saw one that was called kiss my lips and that's just trashy. I don't want that one. I'm thinking that I don't like Dr. Jackson anymore. He gave me a shot and blew up Mary Margarets lips. Did you know he has green eyes?

Questions, Questions, Questions

As you all know, I live with two of the best questioner's in the whole world. Remember last weeks question "Can we go to the island of Viva Viagra?". Well, no such questions tonight, yet, but there have been tons of questions AND they know I watch the Bachelorette on Mondays with absolutely no talking except during commercials.

The questioning started earlier this afternoon when I headed to Dr. Jackson's office to drop them off for fillings and such.
MM: Do you think Dr. Jackson will notice my eyes today?
Taylor: He'll notice your breath cause you didn't brush, stinky. I brushed and I wearing perfume.
MM: Ha! He's gonna laugh at your funny looking head band.
Taylor: No he's not, Kaye make her stop saying that.

Later...
Taylor: (Sniff, Sniff) We're finished come get me.

In the Lucy Van...
ME: Why were you pouting, Taylor?
Taylor: I slipped in some water and fell right in front of Dr. Jackson and made my knee bleed. He probably thinks I'm the biggest dork ever!
MM: He already knew that probably.

Back at work at the Funeral Home
Taylor: Got any dead people here today
Me: Nope
MM: When can I work a funeral service
Taylor: When can I work for Mr. Jere
MM: Do you think Bill needs help?
MM: what color should I wear?
Taylor: Does my mouth look funny?
Taylor: Will I be able to eat dinner? What if I can't eat dinner, will I starve? OMGosh I'm gonna be hungry.

Tonight during the Bachelorette...
Taylor: Can I get my makeup done when we go on vacation?
Taylor: Can we buy a steaming broom?
Taylor: First Im gonna get some cool clothes, high heels, blue high heels and then I'm gonna get my makeup done. Will that happen?
Taylor: Are you listening to me?
ME: I'm typing what you say
Taylor: Are you really? Let me see. OH MY GOSH you are. Hey can I see my new shoes you bought me? yes or No? Are you really going to let me buy some high heels?
MM: Whose riding in our van?
MM: What are they doing on TV? Can I do that? OMGosh I'm gonna watch that show! Are you gonna sell your jeep?
Taylor: yeah then we will have tons of money
MM: I want you to buy me a car with that money

I'M NOT ANSWERING ANY QUESTIONS TONIGHT I DECLARE THIS QUESTION FREE NIGHT.

MM:why?
Taylor:Why are you typing what I say? Can I go to bed? Can I go to your bed and watch the truths of magic show? Can you turn on the air? I'm hot.

That is just 10% of the questioning tonight.

Girls Night Out!

Butler Manor hitting the town for a little shopping, relaxing and food!

It was time for a Girls Night Out at Butler Manor. No, not a girls night out for me, Mary Margaret and Taylor. I'm talking GROWN UP girls night out. Nicole came down this weekend with Alyssa, we hit the town, Dianne, Me, and Nicole. Tunica, Mississippi, here we come. Tunica has this great outlet mall. The ride down was filled with good conversation and awesome site seeing. One little strip mall said we could drink, dance and get tattooed all at the time and travel down the road to get our fortunes read. It's always an experience driving through Memphis. We shopped til we dropped. Our last stop of the shopping spree was Rue21 where I like to get the girls clothes. We had to try a few things on AND I found Dianne's Christmas present, I've got to go back and get it later. Shhhh don't tell her.
If any of you need a personal shopper, this next picture is what we will use on our resume'.
Dianne, Nicole and Me.
Simply gorgeous don't you think?

Before we left, we had a great morning swimming in the cloudy water. Everyone was happy, until...I mentioned that we were leaving the girls with the Butler's so that we could go on our girls night out. Two out of the three children became angry. This is what we left with the Butler's Saturday afternoon.

All that shopping makes a girl hungry so we headed to Sam's Town Casino to eat seafood buffet. Oh my it was good. And yes, all we did was EAT.
Sunday, I grilled massive amounts of pork chops, chicken, and ribs, trying to use up all of the meat in the freezer before we leave out for vacation in two weeks. Later we went to Dianne's, the girls tried out their pool and Dianne and I visited.

AND I have a sunburn.

I Survived Week One of Grounding

How many of you like the game show "I Survived A Japanese Game Show"? The show is one of my least favorite shows. We have our own little survival game going on here at Butler Manor. Most of you know why, if you've missed out, please help yourself and read this weeks posts.

Name of the Game: I SURVIVED WEEK ONE OF GROUNDING

Some of you have voiced your opinions about my grounding MM for lying. I was even called a Fascist once. Some of the comments were sent straight to the trash, others meant a lot to me and gave me the support I needed.

What we have learned this week.

- Teens need a specific list of chores with every detail of the job written out in clear english AND it must have their name at the top or they are confused as to who does the work.
- "Sweep the floor" is not a good description. You must list each step clearly...pick up the broom that is leaning against the wall in the kitchen right beside the microwave. It has a yellow handle and bristles on it. Remove the dust pan that clips to the broom. Be brave, you can do this. Now, take the broom in your hands, oops, I forgot, lay the dust pan down so you can use both of your hands, move the broom, back and forth, touching the floor with the bristle end of the broom. Good girl. Now put the dust pan on the floor and sweep the trash and dust into the pan and empty it in the trash can, you know, the big blue thing with the white trash bag in it.

Is that Specific enough for you? Maybe she said

- Mary Margaret does not like to clean toilets. Her list Thursday went something like this...
Clean the toilet in the bathroom. Get the sponge. Put the Soft Scrub on the Sponge. Now scrub the toilet.
Mop the Bathroom floor. You will have to pick up the rug, trash can, magazines, and scale to mop the floor.

When I got home, with my eagle eye, I noticed right off that the magazines were just as I left them. The bobby pin was still on the floor, exactly where I left it this morning. The toilet was not clean AND she mopped only right in the door way of the bathroom.

I ask her to get her cleaning stuff so she can do it again. She is not happy. Well, neither am I. I left her a task and I expected her to complete it and complete it like I like it done. She knows how, this ain't her first bathroom rodeo. She takes the sponge, drops it on the seat of the toilet and puts her pointer finger barely on the sponge and moves it around with her finger, CAUSE she doesn't want to touch the gross toilet and any way she didn't ASK to clean the toilet and you were not specific about how to clean the toilet.

Oh Really?

Looking Back and Grilling Gone Bad

Do you remember last summer when I made the girls study a different country each week and then we tried to cook a meal from that country AND dress the part? We all got huge laughs out of those nights. I got the feeling a couple of times that just maybe all you guys and the both the girls might have thought that I was just a tad bit crazy. After reading this blog all this year, I'm sure you now know my elevator got stuck between the 3rd and 4th floor.

Tonight I've brought the cooking back to Butler Family Diaries, a.k.a. Butler Manor. I hate to disappoint, but, there will be no costumes, just pictures.

Grilling gone bad. This is what happens when you ask a child to hand you the seasoning, this child opens the seasoning, and thinking that they are WAY smarter than you are, proceeds to dump on the seasoning.

That, my friends, is half a bottle of Webber Mesquite Burger Seasoning. I managed to scrape the burger and all was well. Freckles and Pepper fought over who was going to stand the closest to me and wait for me to drop a burger or hot dog. It didn't happen.


Finished product. Grilled burgers seasoned with Webber Grill burger seasoning, seasoned fries with cheese and ranch dressing. The fries were just about as close to Chili's fries as you can get. We love them.

It's time to remember the good ol' days here at Butler Family Diaries. I did not realize that I have been blogging for almost 4 years now. Aren't y'all tired of me yet?

July 2008 has two of my favorite post. Remember when I tried to have dinner from a different country each week? I was going with the flow of the mom bloggers last July, they were all being so creative, setting up these neat little place setting and taking wonderful pictures of their dinners, kinda "how to cook like me" tutorial. Here at Butler Manor we had ...

Taco Tuesday!!!! The girls loved dressing up for that one.
and the most embarrassing foreign dinner had to be...

Italian Night The dress up part for this dinner turned out to be a really bad 80's job for me. I was going for the role an Italian Mom type person.

July 2007,Happy 4th of July

July 2006, Happy 4th of July

July 2008 was really the height of my creative career.

Cloudy Water and Other updates

After weeks of chemicals this is what I have...

Cloudy Water. I used the last of the clarifier and muriatic acid last night and still no clear water. It is frustrating to say the least.

Found my wedding band, after looking through the vacuum cleaner bag, trash, and looking through the house for 2 weeks. Mary Margaret found it last night while dusting the bookshelves. BTW she's dusted this same shelf twice since the ring has been lost. Housework is part of her grounding. So now attack me for using her for child labor. I also make her vacuum the whole house, wash dishes, wash clothes, fold clothes, and backwash the pool. Go Ahead...I'm ready.

Taylor is still trying to figure out how she can become a contestant on every single games show and reality show that she sees. She is writing down every product she sees on the infomericals so that I can spend my life savings on them, which isn't much by the way.

Pepper, the cat, has finally gotten used to Freckles, the dog. She no longer gets spastic when he comes near. Last night I sat on the deck and enjoyed listening to the crickets and frogs, Pepper jumps up in my lap and Freckles sits at my feet with his nose just inches from Pepper. Pepper looks up at me with that look "this is so boring, does he really think he's cute? I'm the one with all the looks" and then she flicked her claws out and tapped his nose and off he went to the other side of the deck. Pepper was pretty smug after that.

The step-dad of Mary Margarets, now ex-boyfriend, called me last night to apologize for all the text messages. I explained to him what went down and about that question his son asked MM. He apologized and said he would get to the bottom of things and that by the end of the evening his son would understand that Mary Margaret is in trouble, grounded and to leave her alone.

Nicole is coming down with Alyssa this weekend. I'm excited! Hopefully Saturday will be a funeral home free day!!!!

Backwards?

To the anonymous person that left me a comment yesterday. I would never publish the filth that you wrote yesterday AND it did not make sense anyway. I'm sure my readers do not read the blog you first left the comment on.

Comment moderation is a good thing. There are some sick and twisted people in this world.

All this just because I grounded a 14 year old that lied for 2 months and ran up a huge cell phone bill. I don't consider this child abuse, as I have so been accused. This makes me backwards? No this makes me a parent that cares what happens to their child. In this family, here in the deep south, located in the good ol' USA, children are not allowed to run wild or lie.

I'm sure that I am "backwards" compared to more advanced countries. BUT, there's always a but, right? I have lived to the ripe old age of 35, have a husband that has lived to be 38, two girls have made it to 13 and 14, I also have two brothers, one 33 and one 30 that I had a major hand in raising, so I must not be too backwards. The people in my care have not had any major injuries, have not starved to death, and leave the house dressed everyday. So, I'm thinking things are good here in the deep south. Does this make me backwards?

God has provided and protected. I would not have made it to the ripe old age of 35 without Him. God is Good. This makes me backwards? This makes me hated by those who do not know Gods love for them.

Proud to Be An American backwards or not.

20th Century and Beyond

Yesterday's post was poking fun at a comment left on Mary Margaret's Blog.

Click here to read the comment.

This young lady and her friends left some intelligent comments on my post yesterday about Fascism, y'all should go read them. How do I know they are friends, I have the Feedjit on my blog and it shows me where you all come from. Do they seriously think I consider myself a fascist? I'm anything but that. I'm a mom trying to make her children do right.

Harlow, dear, I know I'm old and living in the 20th century and I'm sorry that irritates you. I didn't look that word up on the Internet. I used what we called a BOOK back in the day. Webster's Dictionary to be exact, and I didn't look up just one word, I looked up two. I wanted to be sure that I had it exactly right before I posted it here in the 21st Century. Have you considered that there is way more to the story than what you know? I do not post every single detail of my life on this blog. Now, if I bother you, stop reading my blog, no one is making you read it.

I'm going to borrow the comment left by my friend Emma on Mary Margaret's blog, just in case y'all miss reading it. She sums up what I'm doing perfectly and she's a better writer than me, lol.

Emma's comment
Here is my opinion, and you can take it for what it's worth. Let me preface this by saying that I am NOT 18 years old, I DO have teenagers of my own, and I have worked with teens professionally as well as in our church for years.

Kids need boundaries. What you did was not unacceptable in the least bit. What you were doing was demonstrating a few things:

1) Lying will not be tolerated
2) Actions have consequences, natural or otherwise
3) You expect the best from her because you want the best for her

Setting boundaries for kids/teens is actually PROVEN to increase self-esteem and confidence. True, not ALL girls that are promiscuous end up pregnant before graduating high school. However, asking her the direct line of questioning that you did let her know that HER trust was in question. This was poignant in that it taught her in order to earn your respect and trust, she needs to be honest and act with integrity in all things. You are teaching her to be steadfast and immovable in her values, her virtue and her faith. This will lead to self-respect as well as respect for you. Her rebellion is not a personal attack against you because she thinks you are doing a horrible job. It is just her being a normal teen trying to figure out her place; trying to establish some Independence. Good thing she got caught in a small lie, providing this “learning opportunity” now, before it’s too late. Having rules will prepare your children for the ‘real world’ that is composed of many rules and boundaries.

MM knows you absolutely love her and adore her. In fact ANYONE who knows you and the girls know that these two are your top priority. She may not like or agree with all of your rules, but did any of us agree with all of our parents rules?

Emma

Isn't Emma a good writer? She has a wonderful blog. Check her out.

To those of you who do not have children yet, remember this, setting rules and boundaries and enforcing them does not make you a Fascist, Dictator, Tyrant, or Hitler, it makes you a parent that cares about the who, what, when, and where, of their lives because you love them unconditionally.

Fascism

Fascism: a governmental system led by a dictator having complete power, forcibly suppressing opposition and criticism, regimenting all industry, commerce, etc., and emphasizing an aggressive nationalism and often racism.

Fascist: a person who is dictatorial or has extreme right-wing views. a person who believes in or sympathizes with fascism.

I've been accused of being a fascist because I'm grounding my 14 year old for lying for 2 months about who she was "dating".

A Southern Fascist! That's me! If that's what it takes then so be it.

I'm thinking of taking over the world. Who wants to go to Paris, I'm starting there first!

Before the Drama

Before all the drama unfolded Friday night. We went to Paul and Dianna's.

We had a little of this...

There was a whole lot of this...

And there were cute babies everywhere...this is Madison, Paul and Dianna's granddaughter. Yes, Dianna is a Mamaw and I'm not, yet, I could be, OMGosh, I'm headed back to the headache zone.

Yesterday was very long and stressful. Mary Margaret is extremely mad. Couldn't tell if it was mad that she got caught or if she was mad at me for catching her. Make sense?

We headed to Forrest City to grocery shop. I did not feel like shopping in Wynne, did not want everyone to see the stress and the blowed up mad 14 year old and I usually see tons of people that come through the funeral home. Taylor got all dolled up like we were going somewhere special. She even asked on the drive to FC if she should put on her makeup, which is a huge deal, cause she doesn't like makeup.

Of course when I walked through the doors, first people I see, were at the funeral home recently buying a funeral. Luckily, Taylor and MM had to go to the restroom 1st thing so they were already off to the restroom.

All day yesterday we hashed it out over things she had or hadn't done, to which I always responded, tell me why I should believe you. So, to prove my point, I made her pick up a pregnancy test and told her she would pay for it and she would take it. Taylor almost smooth passed out right there in Wal-Mart. So I asked Taylor, do I need to make you take one too? Her knees buckled a little bit and she whispered, no mam, I haven't even looked at a boy like that.

It was a quiet shopping trip, until we walked up behind a familiar family. Dianna, Paul and Shelby. We stand there for a bit, Paul looks at the stuff I'm getting for the pool, and then he sees the test. Mary Margaret turned white as a sheet. He says...dang Kaye, whos that for? Taylor yells out its for Mary Margaret not me.

Quiet.

Dianna breaks the ice by looking at Mary Margaret and says, have you been naked with a boy?
No
Then you don't need it, right?
NO

We walk around for a few minutes with them and Mary Margaret catches me alone, she's crying and she says. Kaye Kaye, I promise I'm not gonna be like my mom. I don't want to be what she is. I don't want to ruin my life. Please don't make me take that test. I promise I haven't been with any boy.

I let her put it up. Maybe I'm stupid for believing her. I can't say that I know when she's telling a lie, cause I failed that one. But I truly think the look in her eye when she said that was the look of the truth.

Oh, P. S.
This morning, when I turned her phone on, there were 25 text messages from the boy. Apparently, he did not understand the text that said DO NOT TEXT MARY MARGARET ANY MORE.

The Drama at Butler Manor is BACK!!!

I know I promised a diet update next, but...
You've missed the drama. Butler Manor was getting down right boring.

Pause....
I'm watching the preview to the new Harry Potter, its looks pretty good.
Back to the program...

While Justin Timberlake is busy bringing Sexy Back, we here a Butler Manor are bringing DRAMA BACK. You heard it folks, things are really beginning to heat up.

Remember how Mary Margaret was so head over heals in love with Casey, so much that she wasn't going to wash her hand ever again? She even wrote a whole post about it. I was so excited for her, finally a boy who seemed to truly like her. Bonus: I know the boy's parents and they are good people.

Here's how yesterday played out...

Mary Margaret had a date with Casey to go see Ice Age 3. She was excited. I tell her she needs to call Casey and make sure he's going tonight. She says his phone is out of minutes and he can only text and he's not answering the text. I tell her that we've been invited out to Dianna's and Paul's to swim and eat for the 4th. So, just to make sure she doesn't miss her date, since Casey is not answering, I have his mom's number from my beauty control stuff, I'll just call her and check it out and see if he's still going. She says oh, don't worry about it, I'm thinking I don't want to go because I saw on facebook that he's talking to this other chick Alison. I think I'm finished with him.

WELLLLLLL, this makes me furious! I tell her she needs to break it off. She says, he's out of minutes. I say, if you saw all this stuff on facebook, get on there and write it on his wall and get it over with. She didn't really want to but did cause I made her. I read it before she sent it....Casey, I think we need to just be friends since you love Alison. I won't be at the movies tonight. Happy 4th of July.
NO TEARS over the boy she's been madly in love with since the middle of May.

We go to Dianna's. I tell them all about it. Can't believe Mary Margaret was getting 2-timed.

I get home and check my facebook and I see a comment that Alison made on Mary Margaret's break up post to Casey. This girl says basically, Why would my boyfriend want someone like you.

I read this to Mary Margaret and she is unconcerned. She gets a text. Taylor asks is that Casey? She says how do you know its Casey? It's his ring tone, right? Oh, yeah. I say to her read it and SHE DOES!!! It says hey baby. I tell her to txt him back and tell him to loose her number. She shrugs and says I'm just gonna leave it alone. Okay. He txt her again. This time it says R U MAD AT ME? Are you kidding me? Did this kid not know what was going on? I tell her to say check your facebook. She doesn't want to. I make her. She puts her phone on silent. Rocks on for a few minutes and I see her check her phone and I ask who's txting you. Oh, its Casey he wants me back. I say no, you tell him to get on facebook and talk to you. He can't.

What's going on here?

I give her the computer and let her get on facebook for awhile. When she's not looking I pick up her phone and proceed to read her messages...

MM: Allison wants to talk to u! JK!
CASEY: Who the beeb is that
MM: IDK i have to go
CASEY: Nooo don't go
MM: Y
C: cause I love u babe
MM: okay
C: Are we still going out ( she actually read this one to me so I maker her...)
MM: just check your facebook (oh, she did not want to do that)
C:what
(I now have the phone)
ME: just get on facebook
C: can't don't have internet
something is fishy
ME: I saw the messages you sent to allison
C: again, who is allison
ME: you know who allison is
C: IDK, can you send me a pick of you
notice the spelling of pic...
ME: Nope, not allowed
C: aw, come on u know ur the only girl 4 me
ME: Casey, I saw what you said on facebook to allison
C: Wtf who casey and where r u gettin this from?
ME:Facebook is where I saw it and don't say WTF to me
C:lol okay I don't have facebook
Me: this is casey simmons right
c: r u pulling a prank on me
ME: no
C: if I had a facebook it would be jta1001
Me: what
Me: who is this
long pause
Me: txt me plez
C:jacob adams
WHAT IS TARNATION IS GOING ON HERE? I think to myself. I look over at MM, who has no Idea this is happening, she's happily typing away on facebook taking all those stupid quizzes. Did she really go with Casey to the movies last Friday?
Me: the Jacob I went to the movies with last Friday?
C?: yes I went to the movies with you.
SLAP ME IN THE FACE.
Me: oh, your number got saved under casey simmons name by accident
c: okay
me: call me
C: i can't i told you i can txt not call im out of minutes
me:jacob
(then I sent a few blank messages cause I'm such a good texter and all)
adam: what's going on
me: phone crazy brb
me: my aunt almost caught me
adama:caught you what, playing with yourself? lol

FORTHELOVEOFPEANUTBUTTERANDJELLYSANDWHICHES.
I did confront her last night. This is already the longest post ever...I'll save her remarks for the next post.
Oh, I feel my blood pressure going up right now just sitting here thinking about it again.

I have been played. SERIOUSLY PLAYED. By a very smart 14 year old. How stupid this makes me feel and OMGOSH how stupid did she make herself look when she went ahead and posted the break up on facebook and she wrote that post about not ever washing her hand again...OMGOSH. She made herself a huge mistake. I'm so mad I can't decide where to start grounding her first. I have decided to let her live, because I can't be her worst nightmare from JAIL.