A friend of mine recently decided it was time to jump back into the workforce with both feet. She applied for several jobs hoping to get a call from someone soon. She calls me one day to ask for my advice, bestow my wisdom on her, so to speak.
"Should I apply to Substitute Teach?"
"If you want to." (can't you hear all the wisdom pouring forth for her to soak up and use later?)
We both say all the time...I LOVE kids I want 20 more, whining, begging, complaining, wonderful little angels.
She continued to ask my advice...
She says "On this application, they want to know why I want a job." she asks, "Should I put, I don't like kids, can't stand them, but if you give me a job I promise to not cause bodily harm and be as nice as $55 a day will allow me to be."
Again, I bestow my wisdom..."Um, that could work two ways, for ya. They either totally "get" your honesty or call the cops. You decide."
She must have really impressed them or she was the only one that passed her criminal background test, because today, she got her call.
2nd grade
She called, all excited because today was the first day of the rest of her life, today she became a SUBSTITUTE TEACHER.
The excitement, lasted until she got to school and the class came in.
It went a little something like this...
KID: Hey what's your name. You are supposed to write your name on the board so we know your name.
KID: Can I call you Judy?
FRIEND: No, you can not call me Judy.
KID: Why not, I want to call you Judy.
FRIEND: No, you can't call..
KID: WHY, I want to call you Judy.
FRIEND; BECAUSE JUDY IS NOT MY NAME.
FRIEND: get quiet
FRIEND: Get Quiet
FRIEND: GET QUIET
FRIEND: I SAID GET QUIET!!!!!
KID:We don't act like this everyday.
FRIEND: I bet you are, thats why Mrs XXXX looked so dang tired and bolted from the room as soon as I got there. Im sure you are good all the time.
FRIEND: If I ever, ever have to come back to this room, I'm bringing the principal.
Now back to me...
I've lost 7.5 lbs. My pressure is on track. I don't feel so close to death after working out and I'm not having a problem resisting food. I can tell you that I can not be near an open or poured Dr. Pepper. As a matter of fact, I can almost taste one right now. Someone slap me out of it.
Monday, February 09, 2009
Subsitute Chuckles
Posted by Kaye Butler at 6:54 PM
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4 comments:
*smack smack* Feel better? I'm sooo sorry here have a Dr P. I won't tell anyone. ;)
Honey with all the torture you've put yourself through that weight better straighten up and fly right off.
7.5 pounds is great! You are doing such a good job; hang in there! Maybe you can try a Diet DP? That's working for me.
haha about the sub teaching. i did it for 2 years. i actually love it. BUT i will onlyh do elem & high...no jr high. here is my trick for Elem kids. i write R E S P E C T on the board. I tell them that they need to respect me as well as others in the class. This is my only "Rule". When I am talking, respect me and listen. When I ask you to do something, respect me and do it. When it's someone else's turn to talk, respect them and listen. When it's time to work, respect others by doing your work quietly. Respect also means keeping hands to yourselves and not acting up or out towards each other. Anytime there is a huge lack of respect (such as out of control talking) I will simply walk over to the board and erase a letter. As long as there is at least one letter left at the end of the day, I will give the teacher a good report. If there aren't, then they get a bad one.
I LOVE this technique! I do not have to yell. As soon as I start to erase a letter, the class hushes down, and the good kids help the not-so-good kids pipe down. Also - if I know ahead of time I will be subbing for a week, I tell them that if there is at least one letter left at the end of each day, that they can have a "party" the last 10 minutes of class on the last day. (Which means they can bring a treat from home and sit and visit with a neighbor).
Kudos on the 7.5 lbs!!!
But, but.... what about Diet DP? Don't you LIKE them? Or just makes you miss the real thing more? So sorry - I love them, too. Major congrats on the 7.5 lbs!
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