April Fools Day at Kernodle Funeral Home

You might think that a Funeral Home, 81 years old, would be full of wonderful April Fools jokes, and it is. Not the ones that I was hoping for, but they are good.

Adry Fifer was the embalmer here for 39 1/2 years. He passed away in 2006. I only knew him for a short time, but long enough to know that he had a great sense of humor. I asked today about April Fools...

All of these pranks were played on poor old Mr. Fifer...he always made you think that he was going to get you back...he never did...that was his way of getting you back...the worry of what he might do.

Prank #1: Fifer had just bought a new truck, drove it one street over to the post office, left it running. The caretaker of the Funeral Home, Mr. Neal, happened by and noticed the truck running, got in it, drove to the Funeral Home and put it in the garage and put the door down. Fifer came walking back, very somber, and started looking for the police phone number. Bill, funeral director at the Funeral Home, asked what's going on. Fifer: somebody done stole my brand new truck...he tells the whole story and then Mr. Neal walks in and gives him his keys.

Prank #2 Fifer leaves for the day, gets in his truck, starts the truck, puts it in drive, and the truck doesn't move. Bill and Neal had put the truck up on bricks, enough that the truck is 1 inch off the ground.

Prank # 3 Fifer gets ready to leave and again, his truck is missing. Bill and Jeffery had pushed his truck into the casket loading ramp, very good hiding spot.

DO YOU SEE A PATTERN?

Prank #4 Poor old Fifer...gets in his truck, puts the key in and turns it on. Each time Fifer turned the key, the horn bl owed. Bill had rewired the horn.

Prank #5 Secretary thinks that Bill is doing her a favor, gets her car keys, and says, I'll start your car and turn on the heat for you...instead, Bill pulls the car to the door, turns on the air conditioning, rolls down the windows on a very cold day.

Prank #6 Chris (extra help around the funeral home a long time ago) opens a casket that is supposed to be empty and finds the funeral director laying there...this prank got no reaction.

The above pranks all happened on April Fools Day. The next pranks happen on a daily basis...

CURRENT SECRETARY: Strange objects found in the purse: Huge piece of metal weighing in at about 10 pounds, huge nuts and bolts, Geritol bottles, brass dresser pulls, fake dog poop, used tissue paper, LOTS OF MARBLES, purse sometimes comes up missing, the list goes on and on and on and on...sometimes these strange things turns up in the coat pockets because the secretary has learned to not bring a purse. The secretary would be me.