July 2015

October 26, 2014 used to be my day ever.  I think that July 11, 2015 tops that.  I haven't been able to hear MM's voice since Oct 26.  I've seen her a few times.  She didn't speak at Christmas to us at Tim's parents house.  In February for the first time in 19 years I was not the first one to wake her up and wish her happy birthday, yet I found comfort knowing that at least someone was getting to tell her happy birthday.  In May she walked right past me at the hospital to see Tim's dad, never looked at me nor spoke, yet I found comfort that someone knew how to contact her.  July 11 on our way home from one of our best vacation, relaxing, forgetting the real world, Tim's brother calls and says he can't stop MM from leaving with this...

why? Because she is an adult.  So, my baby, that is what she is even if she hates me for some unknown reason, is moving to Illinois with a Felon.  Not just any Felon, a felon that has been found guilty of stalking and setting up a meeting to abduct a child. 

She's going to marry her.
My 20 year old baby is going to marry a 43 year old child abductor.
My baby girl is going to marry a grown woman.
My father in law still has some contact with her and that is my only comfort.  Waiting for a tid-bit that the in laws choose to share with my husband. Not me.

How do parents of abducted children or murdered children live, breathe, eat.  I hear  and have nightmares about what my baby is doing.  Those parents only have wonder, nightmares, what if's and never anything tangible.

I heard this was said when the woman came to pick her up "I've never seen her be so happy to see someone".

Oh, and no one can do anything because she's 20.

BS

Since May 2014

Since graduation, May 2014, life at Butler Manor has spiraled down hill as fast as a speeding bullet.  Mary Margaret left.  We wouldn't let her be gay, smoke, cuss me, call her sister retarded, cuss her sister, date full grown men with children (who can't even have visitation with said children), made her stop sending out nude photos to underage boys.  So she left.  It has been sad.  The lies she has told. Awful.  I know she's not gay.  She brags about her boyfriends, but while she has girlfriends she only says "talking to a wonderful girl."  We have to believe that we have done our best.  Hope that some of what we tried to instill in her will surface before she gets hurt.  I do miss our beautiful YARM13YOL.  Haha.  She loved that name when blogging was the "fad".  Our funny, try anything once, dimple faced little girl.  We HAVE to TRUST God and know that he is with her, even if she doesn't believe.

Now its 3 weeks before Taylor graduates.  I do have to admit, that our life is much more simple.  No wondering if MM is going to blow up, no waiting on her to get off work and wonder will she come home, Taylor doesn't get picked on at school as much for her sister being gay.  Taylor sits in the living room and talks to me.  She talks more everyday.  I know she misses MM.  MM tricked her in February, called and said she wanted to come home.  She used Taylor to let her in the house and ram shack the house and steal.  It devastated Taylor beyond words.

Taylor is slowing becoming a mature young woman.  My tbug. Love.

Graduated!!! (whew)

 

Family Graduation Photo!

 Well folks, after such a long pause (one year plus)...there have been many things  blog worthy.  The BIGGEST is that finally, after many long years of school, Mary Margaret graduated.  It was sketchy for a while, but she pulled through. WE are SO PROUD of her.

She has a new boyfriend.  Cody.  So far so good almost one month.

 

This year has been better, such a relief.  I can see the girls growing up a little more.  This year we were really involved in Relay for Life.  Dianne would have been thrilled and would have had a blast with us.  We raised almost 3,000.  Pretty good for our little JPC Group.

 

 

We had a great group of JPC girls this year!  Always willing to participate in what ever crazy plan I came up with. 

Me, Susan Williams and Carakay Copes

Half of our JPC Group

 



Im trying..New Stuff

Well, not really New.  I'm inheriting a new role with the JPC's.  So far, so good.  I'm slowly taking over.  I've planned the spring schedule. Hopefully, gotten a last minute photographer for the winter formal.  Fingers crossed.  I'm already classified crazy...this should seal the deal!

Sarcastically.....MM woke up in another wonderful mood/attitude today.  I asked Taylor to ask MM is she worked today.  Taylor came back from the Lions den, dragging her leg and missing an eyeball with the answer...Y.......E......S.   Poor Taylor.  I should have asked her, but I needed both of my eyes and legs to go to work myself.  I heard MM, "O....M....G....I wish you people could just remember stuff and stop bothering me!"

Sunday she was going to break up with her boyfriend because she was sure, since he was not answering his phone, that he was cheating on her.  She was told by "tons of people" that he was cheating.  First, he stays grounded, second, her phone is locked and only me, Tim, Taylor, her work and the boyfriend can call said phone, so how is she talking to "tons" of people over Christmas break, third, his mother and father are battleing over custody and visitation...so maybe they were just a tiny bit busy?   Of course none of that is an excuse to ignore her phone calls.  You will all be glad to know that at school Monday morning everything was settled and back all hunky dory. (however that is spelled)  And, nobody in our house likes her, Taylor hates her.  I said no she doesn't, she said yes she does...over and over and over, so I said....Maybe you shouldn't say ugly things about her at school...good to know...she doesn't say ugly things about Taylor those people are just lieing on her.

Good Grief Charlie Brown.

Thanks Joanna for the encouragement!

Pictures Lie

Pictures lie.  My girls smile like they are best friends in pictures. 
That is so far from the truth. 

Mary Margaret is ugly to Taylor all of the time.  She is hateful to me. She is practically hateful to everyone.  She does hateful things to Taylor at school...or maybe I should say she is involved in some hateful gossip.    This is not Taylor telling me, this is other parents telling me and Im seeing it myself.  Does no good to ground her...it makes her worse.

I'm sure Taylor can be ugly to Mary Margaret to.  I don't see it though.  If I suggest to Taylor to offer something to Mary Margaret...the answer is always hateful.

There's so much more that I can't share.

I don't know what to do to make Mary Margaret like us more.
I don't know what to do to make them be friends.

Someday...it will only be Mary Margaret and Taylor, then what?

I just feel...blah!