I Know HE Didn't

Tim and I have been working at the funeral home together. We have been extremely busy. Have I mentioned how easy going, laid back, and comical Tim is? Well, he is. He finds humor in almost anything.

He says things like..."I take orders only from the President of Kernodle Funeral Home! The President trumps the Vice President, Secretary, and whatever else. Where did you get your orders?" or "Kaye, you need to come hold $%^&'s hand again." AND sometimes you might find him kind of skipping down the hall yelling my name in a sing song kind of way. Again...he cracks me up.

He REALLY cracked me up yesterday.

We are sitting in my office, waiting on a funeral to start...
Tim: Why does the name #$@!&% sound familiar to me?
Me: I used to work for him, I gave him my two week notice and he said no, you can't quit, I fire you and give you two weeks pay.
Tim: Oh, yeah I remember that kind of.
Me: Your father-in-law knows him too.
Tim: Which one?
Me: What?
Tim: which father-in-law?
Me: Um...how many father-in-laws do you have?
Tim: dunno.

He gets up and walks out of the room.
Was he kidding?
Do I need to ask for spousal support?
I want a BIG house with a HUGE UNDERGROUND SWIMMING POOL, hot pool boy, maids, etc. and he can have all the father-in-laws he wants. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

I KNOW HE DIDN'T.

Boss #2 Conversation
Boss #2: Hey, my wife found a spider in my bed where I sleep. I almost got bit by it.
Me: What kind?
Boss #2: a Ludicrous Spider.
Me:(imagine me with my eyebrows raised in question) What did you say?
Boss #2: a ludicrous spider. It could have killed me. We buried a guy that got bit by one and he died, dead.
Me: Do what? What did it look like?
Boss #2: a.....ludicrous.....spider! Brown with a Viola on it's back.
Me: a Brown Recluse?
Boss #2: That's what I said.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOkay.

Ludicrous. It's how I roll.